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Friday, 5 September 2014

Dear Every Girl and Every Boy...An Ex Can NEVER Be a Friend.

Dear every girl and every boy,

An Ex-boyfriend or Ex-girlfriend can never be friends. 

No, there is no exception to this rule without one party or the other developing "feelings" for the other or hoping things could go back to the way they once were or without it impacting your present and future relationship and friendships in negative ways.

There will never be a situation where both of you ride off into the sunset on a horse named Friendship after you have parted ways no matter how "good" you think the breakup was or how much you both felt the breakup ended "on good terms". The relationship didn't work. The friendship won't do you any good either. It will impact your future. Always. In not-so-good ways.

There will be no good outcome of providing bullsh*t like: "umm..I don't know...been through so much..used to him/her...don't want to seem rude..." No one will buy that. Especially not your present-someone-special. If they are special then they damn well need to be treated in a special way. 


Also if you feel that your present/future-someone-special will just have to accept your "independent nature" and be okay with one or a few Exs who are around then you are mistaken. Firstly, that has nothing to do with what an "independent nature" is. It is in fact quite the opposite. You have come to unconsciously depend on it. Secondly, no one wants excess baggage. No one wants the possibility of being compared to a past that is so in tune to what is happening in your present. No one wants to be in an uncomfortable situation when your present-someone-special is asked "Oh so he/she is still friends with their ex? Cool." It is not cool. No, it is not. 


If you cannot put yourself in a situation that involves the drama then you possibly cannot even begin to hope for your present-someone-special to do the same. 


Yes, your friends may sympathize but if you are someone who is in this situation then I don't have to tell you that after a while even they will fail to see why you are friends with your Ex when it is clearly getting in the way of the relationship and friendships you now have. 


Ladies and Gentlemen, please love yourself enough to stop the torture that comes with the drama; torture to yourself and to your friends. 


Leave an Ex where they belong: as an EXample of what you will NOT date in the future and certainly would NOT like to be around.

Get well soon.
Every friend"

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